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Tabgha: A story of faith, failure, and redemption

Andy Nash, University of Nebraska - Lincoln


Through an exhausting eight-year experience I would have never chosen, I've learned more about what it means to come to the end of self. At age 29, restless and confident, I set my sights on an ambitious professional dream and wound up launching a far-reaching and risky enterprise: the second-largest magazine launch in American history. The experience consumed my life, battered my faith, and tested my family. It also left me in a condition where I, as a Christian, believe God could better use me.^ This spiritual memoir describes my difficult journey from confidence to brokenness: "To join the club of the broken, you've got to have a certain look in your eyes—a look of resignation, of exhaustion: a look that says your plans just didn't work out like you thought they would. But it's also a look of strange serenity, of submission, of finally releasing what you held onto so fiercely."^ Among the story's themes are: (1) The search for calling: the tricky balance between discovering your calling—and not worshipping it. (2) Healing strained relationships with family and friends. My relationship with my dad is an especially important thread. (3) Grappling with God: the confusion of thinking God brought you somewhere—just to leave you there. (4) Letting go of what you most love—and learning that you must give up some things altogether.^ Tabgha: A Story of Faith, Failure, and Redemption is the flip side of the prosperity gospel. It reminds us that the greatest riches come when we lose ourselves—and that stepping in faith isn't supposed to be exciting; it's supposed to be painful. ^

Subject Area

Literature, Modern|Literature, American|Spirituality

Recommended Citation

Nash, Andy, "Tabgha: A story of faith, failure, and redemption" (2009). ETD collection for University of Nebraska - Lincoln. AAI3379833.